Real estate entrepreneur. Television personality. Spray tan enthusiast. Businessman. Active Twitter user. Investor. Self-proclaimed high-heel raiser and bathing suit shrinker. Actor. Film producer. Surname fanatic. Author. Republican Presidential Candidate.

As of November 9, 2016, Donald J. Trump can add “President-elect” to his ever-growing list of titles, and as of January 20, 2017, he can strike the “elect” portion of the phrase.

The American public knew this was a possibility. Pollsters knew this was a possibility. The Obama administration knew this was a possibility. Everyone from Wall Street brokers and foreign diplomats to Hillary Clinton herself knew a Trump presidency was a possibility. Thanks to primarily white, conservative, male, and Christian voters, this possibility has become a reality.  

On Election Day, I was one of the seventy-one million people who tuned in to watch the map of the United States of America slowly but surely color itself crimson. As I write this –less than twenty-four hours after Democratic Presidential Candidate Hillary Rodham Clinton delivered a deeply moving concession speech –I find myself both numb and overwhelmed. Never before have I gazed at the sheer magnificence of Chicago’s skyline at dusk or listened to the cacophony of Lakeshore Drive and felt so strongly that this country isn’t my own.

I do not have the words to describe the profound pain I have carried with me in the wake of this election. This pain is the result of months of brutally divisive politics and hateful rhetoric coupled with our nation’s long, twisted history of discrimination.

Never before in my lifetime have I been so thoroughly and personally exposed to the power of scare tactics. This election was about more than Democrats facing off against Republicans, the donkeys taking up arms against the elephants in a time-honored dance. For me, and for millions of others, this election was deeply personal.

I am a young woman of Latin American heritage, living in a nation in which the next President will have won hundreds of thousands of votes on a platform that validated calling Mexicans rapists and promoted rape culture.

I am the daughter of two gay parents living in a nation in which the next Vice President will be someone who has advocated for conversion therapy and supported a constitutional amendment to ban marriage equality.

Until this election came to a bitter end, I genuinely believed that the United States of America would elect its first female president. I put my faith in Clinton and voting Americans, and waited with bated breath for her to shatter the highest glass ceiling.

I wasn’t alone in my thinking. You’d be hardpressed to find a single poll that predicted this outcome. But Trump supporters came out in droves to support their candidate, claiming states such as Wisconsin and Iowa in a stunning upset.

It would be overzealous for me to claim that every person who cast their ballot for Trump was a bigot. As someone who attends a progressive private school in the blue city of Chicago, I can honestly say that I don’t personally know very many Trump supporters.

But I do know their candidate, and I know what values they decided to elect. Many of them –especially in the Midwest –voted for Barack Obama in 2008 and 2012, hungry to support his message of hope and change. Trump’s message is one of change as well, but unequivocally more dark.

As the next Commander in Chief, Trump is leading a Nationalist wave. From Marine Le Pen in France to Brexit, a movement that has been brewing for years is now launching a full-scale invasion on Western politics. They seek to deepen the divide between citizen and immigrant, and to “take back” what they perceive as being lost in an increasingly globalized world.  

Donald Trump may not be my president, but he is our president. The peaceful transition of power is something that our country cherishes –as it should. Whether you personally like it or not, Trump has secured the presidency, and as such he has legally earned the right to lead and the privilege to plaster his name on another famous building he did not help construct.

I do not pretend to completely understand how we got ourselves tangled up in this mess. Between the media frenzy, scandal, and outright insanity that plagued this election, real politics took a back seat. Looking into the future, it is this uncertainty that agonizes me the most.

When the next Presidential Election takes place in 2020, I will be a sophomore in college. I will exercise my right to vote, and do so with extraordinary care, keeping in mind the immense hurt and frustration I feel now. I do not know yet what the defining moments of Trump’s presidency will be. It’s anyone’s guess as to how the next four years will play out–if this election has taught me anything, it’s how to prepare for the unexpected.

But one thing is for certain: Trump has fanned the flames of fear into a blistering inferno of outrage. During his acceptance speech, he pledged “to every citizen of our land, I will be president for all Americans.” As our nation begins the journey towards healing, I sincerely hope that Trump’s defining moments do not include building a tangible testament to xenophobia or completely eliminating female reproductive rights.

With a Republican Congress, Trump is in a prime policy-making position.  I hope that he skews moderate, maintains good foreign relations, and truly serves all Americans as he claims to–regardless of race, religion, or sexual orientation.

Yet this hope does not take away from the deep-rooted sorrow or the tremendous disappointment I feel. It is with a heavy heart that I learn to move on from the tragedy of today to the promise of tomorrow.

The path to recovery is going to be a struggle. The path to bipartisan cooperation is going to be hard, and the path to national unity is going to be even harder. Let us stand with those who have their livelihoods at stake.

I am not optimistic, but I am trying to find it within my conscience to have faith. This Thanksgiving, let us be thankful for the blessings we do have, and let us be thankful for the blessings to come that we will fight for.