With the beginning of a new school year comes the natural ushering in of a new group of eighty or so freshmen to the Upper School and the bundle of nerves that accompany them. Aside from the usual stress schoolwork places on the backs of high schoolers across the country, this crop of students faces the novelty of a new division — or a new school for some — complete with entirely new hallways, teachers, and extracurriculars.

Like nearly all high schoolers at some point over the course of those four years, whether or not they are willing to admit it, these students will likely find themselves concerned with ‘fitting in’ to the Upper School: Be it the classroom, hallway, or lockers, assimilating to the culture of Parker’s Upper School seems a daunting feat for the typical rising freshman.

These concerns are completely fair — at its worst, high school can feel like a scary, four-year social experiment from hell: can you make it out with friends you can rely on by your side? And I’m pretty confident that at least one or two every high schooler’s friends will change over the course of their four years. Some shifts are more seismic than others, but all have an impact on that person’s life.

This is not to say that social pressure is a constant high school burden. But “Why fit in when you were born to stand out?” is possibly the most cliché way to reassure anyone scared of not fitting in with their classmates, and social tumult is a part of reality in high school. Especially at a small school like Parker, shifts in the social dynamic are felt by a much larger part of the student population than would be at a larger school.

So I asked the Internet for advice. A Google search yielded countless articles with clickbait-y titles like “8 ways to fit in in high school!” and “Advice for those who don’t fit in at their high school.” I scrolled through a few of them. Every one that I read repeated the same bland tips. “Be kind.” “Introduce yourself.” “Be patient.” Not only are these painfully obvious, whoever wrote these articles, high school aged or not, probably had in mind a larger high school than Parker.

But that’s the thing: oftentimes Parker students adhere to more than one of the stereotypical high school personalities you see on TV and in movies: the “jocks” double as the “artists,” the “nerds” are also the ones standing front and center at the microphone at Vespers. Although Parker is no North Shore High School, students with a wide variety of interests can be found grabbing lunch in the cafeteria, working in the library, and playing sports on the field or watching Netflix during their breaks.

So consider this: it may take longer than expected to find your “people,” but in no time you, too, will be making Starbucks runs during Conference or claiming a study room with friends that will last long after you don your caps and gowns.