On orientation day in the auditorium, Head of the Upper School Justin Brandon presented us several ways to show respect. His demeanor was casual, yet he was confident in his convictions. Glancing throughout the auditorium, I noticed many students slouching in their chairs, whispering amongst themselves, and exemplifying the complete opposite of what Brandon was speaking on. Yet, the steps were simple and consisted of things like showing up on time (which is a challenge for me at times). The presentation on respect only lasted for around ten minutes, but it seems that we have already forgotten it.  

The one event, however, that triggered me to write this article was during one senior graderoom. In this particular meeting, we discussed the Senior Weiner t-shirts. In this particular graderoom, a senior boy referred to Brandon and the Dean of Student Life Christian Bielizna as “these two” at one point, pointing to them as though they were his classmates, instead of who they actually are, administrators.

Even thought this event seems isolated, disrespect is an everyday occurrence at Parker. At one point during my science class last year, one student made a “your mom joke” to a teacher. Even more of a daily thing is the Airpods epidemic, the sneaky way that also emulates privilege (mind you, Airpods are $159) to not listen to teachers or, more commonly, to not pay attention during MXs’.

All these microaggressions break one of the oldest rules of society: respecting your elders. Why this is important for us students to remember? Well for starters, they’re your teachers who are in charge of your grade (even if you think that your parents or advisor can talk them out of it). Secondly, these are people that are dedicating their time and energy to your intellectual well-being as well as your development as an individual in our society.  

While the brunt of the work needs to come from the students, the teachers must be accountable. Some teachers have an easier time demanding respect than others. Unfortunately for those teachers, they are quickly labeled as a “hard” or “rude.” For female teachers, the labels extend to a “bitch.”

And let’s not forget about our parents or the parents of other students. In one instance, I saw a freshman boy call one of his friends’ mother a bitch to her face. This is blatant disrespect and something that I could not believe I saw. All families have their own rules, but when talking to other people’s parents, it is safest to use your best manners, and maybe, not call your friend’s mom obscenities.

The disrespect comes from entitlement. Focusing on the people that are the most disrespectful reveals a lot about our school. It shows who has power at our school and who is willing to use that power at the expense of others.

Let’s also remember that in the long run, we won’t survive under this pretense of entitlement. In college and in the workplace, the consequences of disrespect are much greater. No matter how much privilege you think you have, someone is bound to put you in your place.

The saddest part is how we disrespect one another. I’m not going to air out people’s dirty laundry because I feel that I have been blunt enough here, but I’ll leave you with this: if we can’t even respect our administrators, teachers, or even parents, how can we expect to respect one another and even ourselves?

I recognize that respect is an active practice and one that is difficult to maintain at all times. There are times when I would love to curse people out right to their faces, teachers or students alike. We all have our lapses, but what’s important is to maintain our efforts. Respect is a difficult task, but an important one.

As of right now, respect does not mean much to Parker students. Our microaggressions have created a whole culture of disrespect. We need to fix this. Not only because this practice of disrespect will hurt us in the long run, but even now, the majority of our issues can be attributed to this idea of disrespect. So, we better fix this before it’s too late (or maybe it is too late).